I was pretty naive a couple years ago when my first book came out. I held that thing in my hands for the first time and genuinely believed that the hard work was over. Now I'd just sit at home and wait for the world to discover it. Word would spread quickly. It wouldn't be long before the royalty checks started rolling in. No need to promote my book. If God wanted it to sell, it would.

I also felt no urge to become a public speaker. I was a writer, thanks, not a people person. Happy to do my thing from the comfort and safety of my home. I felt most comfortable at my childhood desk, pecking away at my keyboard in peace.

And then my book went out of print. In less than a year. Ouch. Time to rethink some things.

I'm thankful now for the reality check. And the slew of boxes in my closet, garage, basement (I bought out the rest of the publisher's stock of that title.) serve as a daily reminder that this writing gig is more involved than I thought.

I started accepting speaking engagements (2-4 a month, mostly local). People hear me talk then buy my books. My web designer hubby created e-blasts for me. I blogged more about my books. Did some give-aways. Found other bloggers who offered to give away my books on their sites.

To be honest, it all makes me a little bit uncomfortable. Sometimes a lot bit. I want to be humble. I want to glorify Christ. Talking about myself and my books all the time just seems...wrong. So I pray for wisdom, for balance. I ask God to show me what He wants me to do. I ask Him to examine my heart and show me if I've got anything in there that needs to go.

There's a message in my books that lots of people need to hear. When women e-mail me and tell me how God completely changed their hearts toward their husbands and their marriages, I know I'm doing the right thing. And I know God's answering my prayer when I receive a glowing review of a book, and my first thought is, "God, You are so awesome! You wrote this book, not me. How good You are to use it in this way for Your glory!"

I know I'm not honoring God when I check my Amazon sales ranking 10 times a day and get depressed when books aren't selling. 

My 2nd and 3rd books have blown my first one out of the water (which isn't saying much, I suppose), so that's cool. But it won't take much for sales to fizzle out and die. There's a lot of maintenance involved (sigh) in keeping your books on the shelves (of stores, not your own garage!). Some days I just don't think I'm cut out for this.

I try to start each day asking God what He'd like for me to do. And which parts to leave up to Him. How to balance my time among family, friends, church, writing, speaking, book promotion. When to work hard, when to rest. When to speak up, when to shut my mouth. He's faithful, that's for sure. I'm trying to be more assertive, pro-active, what have you. But, on the other hand, God has been so good to plop a good many opportunities right in my lap. Entirely without my help. Imagine that.

The biggest blessing I've gotten from all of this? The people. He's given me a new heart for people, a desire to truly connect with them. A love for His children and a burden to see lost souls come to know the One who gave His life for them.

And He's renewed my awareness of my desperate need for Him. For His love, His forgiveness, His power, His presence. I just want to obey God. One day at a time.